Richard's Commentary on The
Blank Point
"Since
this film was made, I've "come out" as a
transsexual a few times. I used to say, "I am a
transsexual." But after thinking this through,
I've realized that there is a better way to say
what I've experienced: I've had surgical sex
reassignment.
The term transsexual is too loaded. It
conjures images of an ordinary woman waking up
one day, marching like a zombie to some sinister
clinic, and re-emerging flat-chested and bearded
in a suit and tie. It gives people the wrong
impression about who I was, who I am, and what I
had to go through.
I've had gender confirmation surgery. The
term "gender dysphoria" was never true for me. I
was always comfortable with my male gender
identity. It was my sex, my female body, that
created the dysphoria.
My condition can only be called gender
dysphoria if one assumes that gender
identity is formed by examining one's own body,
discovering it to be either male or female, and
accepting that. I saw that I had a female body,
but I knew I was male gendered.
I believe gender identity is not a construct
based on logic. Much like homosexuality, gender
identity is a behavior pattern which isn't
chosen but which emanates from the expression of
one's inner being. People who are presently
labeled gender dysphoric by the
medical/psychiatric community are people whose
gender—whose psyche—whose experience
of their inner being—happens to be opposite
of what their physical body suggests.
Homosexuals are attracted to people with the
same sex characteristics as they themselves
possess. The operative definition of a
transsexual has nothing to do with what type of
people (male or female) they are attracted to.
It has specifically to do with how one perceives
oneself. It is more like sex dysphoria than
gender dysphoria.
This confusion of sex and gender is a problem
for many people. In fact, many times in the
narration of The Blank Point, the auteur uses
the terms interchangeably. One fragment of a
quote I recall is "…people changing gender
to live in the opposite sex." We do not change
our gender; we change our sex in order to
facilitate the full expression of our selves.
Our gender opposes our sex, and it is the
physical sex which causes the dysphoria and
which we want to change. And the social pressure
against (1) even realizing that this is a change
that one needs to make, and (2) against making
that change (as well as the hurdles put up by
the medical/psychiatric community and insurance
industry) is so great that it seems ridiculous
to think that anyone who walks this path has
chosen to do so on a whim. But people do think
that.
Some men think that male-to-female
transsexuals are not tough enough to hack it in
the world of men; some women think that
female-to-male transsexuals are not strong or
courageous enough to make it as a woman in this
"man's world." These people perceive us as weak,
as "cop-outs," as unable to master the hand that
nature has dealt us. These people underestimate
us.
At another point in the film, the narrator
says, "…modern techniques created
transsexualism." I believe this is also a
misconception. Just as homosexuals and
transvestites have existed throughout history,
there have been individuals who have lived their
lives as "the opposite sex." In particular, many
women have "passed" as men: Louis Sullivan, an
author and historian, has documented many cases
of this in his book Information for the
Female to Male Cross Dresser and
Transsexual, published by Ingersoll Gender
Center in Seattle, Washington, and in From
Female to Male: The Life of Jack Bee
Garland, published by Alyson Publications in
Boston, ISBN 1-55583-150-8. Modern techniques
didn't create transsexualism; they created
surgical sex reassignment and made hormones
available.
Misunderstanding of our position, our
predicament, is rampant, even among those who
are working to help us. In The
Blank Point, in describing part of the
genital reconstruction surgery known as
"genitoplasty," Dr. Brownstein says the new
genitalia "gives the appearance of maleness."
This implies that we are masquerading as
men…
If a man suffers an injury and loses his
penis, is he henceforward masquerading as a man?
Maleness does not reside in the penis. Having
genitalia that conform to one's own body image
or self-concept is important, but it is not
always a mandatory component of an actualized
gender identity. Many transsexuals do not seek a
surgical solution—for many reasons—not
the least of which is money. For
female-to-males, mastectomy [excision or
amputation of the breast] is usually
desired, but the results of genital
reconstruction surgery are far less satisfactory
for some because a full-sized and fully
functional phallus is rarely achieved. It is a
risky business.
But focusing too closely on surgery evades
the larger social issues of process. Sarah
mentions her transition, the role change she
experienced as she brought herself slowly into
the world as a woman. I think this aspect is
much more dramatic for a male-to-female.
Female-to-males often have taken themselves
through much of the role change prior to
hormone-aided transition. For us, transition is
a confirmation: our inner truth is becoming
manifest in the world. And it is a time to learn
about and adjust to society and the expectations
of the world. It's a time to find our place in
the world. It's time to grow up, get real, face
facts, make our life work. Nobody else is
responsible for who we are or what we do. We
give birth to ourselves.
