I was asked to write my views and
personal feelings on having surgery and submit
it for you all to read, this is no easy task.
However I will give it my best shot.
For me chest surgery was of the highest
priority as I was unfortunately quite large, and
the older I got the harder they were to hide (in
Queensland summer can be a very nasty season),
and the more depressed I got about myself.
I had my surgery and remember waking up in
recovery, looking down at my chest and saying,,,
“Finally... they are gone!” and it had
felt like I had a huge weight lifted from me,
and not just the masses that were physically
removed either... but somehow easier to breath,
feeling really good about myself. The mere
thought of walking out of the Hospital with JUST
1 SHIRT on brought a Cheshire cat like smile to
my face that had stayed for quite some time.
I was taken back down to the ward feeling
very good about myself at what had just taken
place, this TRULY was the beginning of my
journey to becoming complete, still a long way
to go, but absolutely evident that the wheels
were in motion. I was excited and can only say
that I must have been feeling every emotion I
had ever known, the nursing staff kept telling
me I looked like I had won Lotto or something
big! As the Doctor, so he informed me later, did
not tell any one else of my transition. I left
the Hospital the next day, and have never looked
back.
For me this was the best thing that I could
have done, and now reflecting back on times
before the surgery it seems a vague memory, an
age and a half ago and very hard to recall, or
maybe it is just plain and simply because I
really do not want to remember those days, who
knows.
The way I feel now about myself as a man is
very positive. It has taken me some years to
realise that it really does not matter what
others think of me,,, what really matters and
makes any difference at all,,,, is what I think
of myself as a man.
So for me corrective surgery, I know in my
head and in my heart that this is 100% the right
path that I should be venturing down as my life
just keeps getting better. Doors are opening as
others close, and I doubt very much I would be
were I am today in my life, at peace with myself
with who and what I am, without the surgeries I
have had to date.
There is no one real description that I can
elaborate on to any one of you reading this,
because we all experience and feel things
differently. I can say that I dare to assume
that at some point I/we re-acquaint ourselves
with ourselves and really get to know who we are
and what we are about. Because we become our own
worst/greatest critics and if we are paying
attention and really listening to ourselves we
are our own best teachers/guides.
This is my short story of my life’s
journey, which has only just begun some short 25
years ago. I so look forward to what tomorrow
may bring me, be it good or bad because I am a
content man that can handle life’s
little/large curly ones.
Take good care all, and thank you for
reading.
