I wanted to write about a really cool
work experience I've had in the last few
weeks…
I recently started and finished a part-time
job as a chef in a well known city restaurant,
and met an interesting and encouraging woman.
She is a fellow chef and employee.
I kinda felt at ease with her from the start.
She was open minded and tolerant, I could tell
from her temperament and political leanings. It
was like, one of those meeting when two
strangers meet and go, "yeh, I get you. I like
you too."
Anyway, we went for a drink after work one
night and during the conversation it just got
harder and harder to tell her about my life etc,
without outing myself to her. So I did. It went
really well.
That's not to say she gets it, we haven't
spoken about it that much, tho' I know she's
just dying to ask me a hundred questions. But
what's encouraging is that it just is - she
accepts that I'm FTM, sees me as different to
her, so I suppose at least she sees I'm
transgendered (which I am). And I dunno, I
s'pose I feel validated.
It's not like I didn't know it would happen.
But the thing I like the most is that she kinda
seems to get that she doesn't have to know
everything about my life experiences to
understand my differences, and it's not
threatening to her own identity.
We went for another drink tonight and Al (my
partner) came too. It seems as tho we met a new
friend. What can I say…I feel really
visible. It's a good thing. I can say that I
think visibility and invisibility are both good
and bad in and of themselves.
We live in a xenophobic society that can
barely accept that we exist. That will change,
we are proof of that. The legacy we share will
live on and society will come to love us as they
have other minorities. It just takes time.
Bigots are about and outing yourself to
everybody you encounter is dangerous to your
general health. But being out to those who can
benefit form knowing you is absolutely
worthwhile.
And taking the invisibility forced upon us by
each other or anybody else personally, is
…well, for me…I'm just not willing to
waste my time, life is too short.
I'm not prepared to spend time worrying when
there's so much fun to be had.
